Hollar!

My mom thinks I'm special and is certain I have "a voice." I'm not entirely sure I agree, but will say this for myself: I have an opinion on nearly everything from the Man Booker Prize to Britney's comeback, and can predict the outcome of any Vh1 reality show with almost 100% accuracy (I'm talking to you, Tool Academy). I've always inflicted my unsolicited and often unsubstantiated opinions on friends and family, but now thanks in equal part to my deeply rooted narcissism and the impossibly low standards of the Internet, I am free to unleash them on the world at large.

If anyone actually ends up reading this, which I really, really doubt, I welcome all of your comments, and invite you to call me out with abandon. Do you think "Party Tool" has a better shot than "Tiny Tool"? You're wrong, but let's hear why. Do you feel I use commas indiscriminately and without purpose? You're probably right (see: first sentence of this paragraph), so help a bitch out and tell me to tighten up my game.

The plan is to post on the daily, but I have two jobs and a drinking problem, so let's just play it by ear.